Pitas, frappucinos and bloating.

As you can guess from the title I bought myself a veggie pita and a venti java chip frap with soy (and no whip) and I feel extremely full and bloated and disgusting.   I took 3 laxatives right after, and am going to take another 3 - 4 in about 2 hours.
Oh! but I did do some squats this morning when I woke up and it felt so good :] I may leave the library early to go home and do a proper workout and then go to the gym since I feel really motivated today (yay).
Decided I'd fast the rest of the day and continue until Monday (I think I only work Saturday, so I can just lay in bed all day Sunday and be the lazy blob I am).  I wish fasting and me losing weight would reflect in my face ;[ my face is honestly so chubby it saddens me and is one of the biggest reasons I haven't thrown up in over a month now because I don't want my face to be so swollen. Posted some pics of my face below and as you can tell the chubbiness adds to my baby face making me look like a 13/14 year old instead of looking like a university student.

Coffee, lack of sleep and class in a bit.

so after pulling 2 all nighters with only a 2 hour nap on both days I thought I would pass out like a baby last night.  nope, fell asleep around 1:40 ish am - took me 2 hours to fall asleep (mostly due to my back hurting so much).  Then because I take laxatives like they're candy I woke up at 3 and 5 in the morning to use the bathroom and then at 9 30am at which point I decided there was no point to go back to sleep.  Had starbucks (cause their lattes and fraps are pretty strong - caffeine wise), and now I am in the library at my uni  writing this entry since I have 40 minutes to spare before my lecture.  Also love it when starbucks baristas spell names :] it's cute and gives you ideas of all the different ways you can spell your name ♥
 

Back to the laxative abuse: I have got to stop.  Yesterday I had less than 1/4 cup of noodles sautéed with 1/2 cup of bokchoy and I still took about 5-8 laxatives throughout the day plus another 2 before bed and boy was it bright green.   I have neon green in me! (actually that's apparently just bile, but because the food goes through my system so fast the bile doesn't get digested and comes out the same colour as it was excreted from the liver).    Not only should I stop taking laxatives because they're already wreaking havoc on my body (I'd say more rapidly than when I used to only throw up) but they can be expensive if you keep buying them.  I spent at least $20 a week on laxatives, if not more.  I mean $20  a week adds up to $80/90 a month.   That is more than my cell phone bill and cigarettes in total for the month. 

Last note to add: I am down 2 lbs today :] ♥