So packing everything into my dad's minivan was stressful, but once we got to my new apartment, everything went smoothly. My dad and I actually spent a good 7 hours outside afterwards, visiting two museums and walking up to the top of Mount Royal, and it was super hot; felt like 30 degrees with the sun beating down on you, which was super nice. The nights have also been hot, which is a bit of a bother, but I'm not going to complain since I love summer and hot weather. I think this weather and this move have prompted a more positive me; I'm trying to take better care of myself by washing my face daily, moisturizing, getting enough sleep etc. I have also started wearing make up (mascara), but I think I will stop since I just prefer going natural and my eyes have been doing this weird thing where they sting and start to tear up so bad tears stream down my face (I think it's because of wearing mascara?).
Also I had 'scary' dream, well not scary persay, but unpleasant: basically people were saying I needed help with my throwing up and laxative abuse and so they got this lady to come talk with me and after talking for a bit I said something (which I cannot remember what) and her face kinda looked shocked; she then said "oh I thought this was for attention, not a real case of eating disorder" (or something like that) at which point I panicked and told her we could make a deal, and that if I started eating normal and not purging she wouldn't tell anyone. I also had these two friends who kept following me everywhere/not letting me be by myself cause they had to 'take care of me' (because of my purging) and didn't want me to run away. It left an unsettling feeling in me once I woke up. I don't know, I just don't really like dreams like that.
My heart/circulation/body have all been doing odd things lately, which I will not get into right now as it is late and I need to get up early tomorrow, but it's a bit frightening yet a bit thrilling at the same time.
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